Even masturbation is forbidden and, when I started my periods, I was told it was the "Sin of Eve". Now this sounds very repressive and, of course, it is. My sisters, (younger than me) had exactly the same thing. But that cannot stop the feelings that come with puberty. I suppose that, while living at home, I was never quite sure how far mum would go to see that we had been behaving ourselves. Even on those days when I would be wetter than usual, mum always seemed to be around more. Anyway, eventually, I was allowed to go to college, but the only college they would let me go to was a catering college on day release so there was no chance of living away from home and I had to commute on the train every day. (REALLY tiring!)

Last week, the train back from London was unusually packed. Literally, standing room only. I always make sure I am near a door. That way I have two walls to either lean on or I can look out of the window.

On this day, I was staring out of the window with my back to my fellow passengers when I felt myself being pressed up against harder than usual. In the reflection, I saw a guy about, oh, I don't know, mid 20's? Whatever. I was also aware of feeling something hard against my bum. I know I am inexperienced, but it didn't take me long to realise that it was his cock AND that he was hard.

In an instant, all that repression seemed to well up inside me. (Well, actually, it welled up OUTSIDE me and into my knickers!) I felt SO alive! I was creaming myself and I had a man's cock pressing against my bum! I felt him get into a kind of rhythm. Is that the right word? Finally, I reached around behind and found that not only was he hard but he had it out! As soon as I touched it, I knew I liked it though.

Then I felt his hands on my hips and he was pulling me back gently against him. Then I felt him rummaging around with my skirt and soon I felt his cock against my thighs and my knickers. It seemed to slip between my legs so easily and oh, how I ached to have it inside me right there and then. That was not going to happen though.

Instead, I felt him, well, I guess I felt him masturbating between my thighs and against my knickers. It felt so horny. His pace increased and I was helping him all I could. Soon, I felt the angle of his cock change. It wasn't pressing between my thighs any more, but more upright, like the top of his cock was pressing into my knickers. I swear, if I had not been wearing them he would have been inside me he was EXACTLY against my hole.

Then he went still and I felt it twitching. I also felt warm and more wet. I knew in a moment he was cumming against my knickers. That did it. I am used to having sexy dreams but, (and please don't laugh) I have never tried to masturbate. But there I was in that train, a strange man cumming on my knickers and suddenly I was cumming too. I felt like I was going to wet myself and I tried so hard to stop it happening.

But suddenly it was there and I came hard. I felt something coming out of me too. I didn't think I had peed, but I wasn't sure. I felt him reach around me and his hand worked into my knickers and for the first time I had a man touching me. His fingers found my clit and he seemed to keep that orgasm going for ever.

Well, all good things come to an end and the next station arrived which was mine. I got out of the train and went to the nearest toilet. In there, I found that I had sperm all over my knickers and down my thighs. It was also on the inside of my skirt. It smelled musty, but very sexy. Inside my knickers it looked like such a mess. The whole gusset was soaked and I was wet half way up my bum. There was NO way I was going to be able to explain THIS to mum.

Its funny though, how sometimes in life you can have these moments of absolute clarity. Fuck this, I am 18. I am entitled to do whatever I want and if that is let a man masturbate against me, or, for that matter, fuck me raw, then that is my choice and my choice alone.

When I got home I decided to talk to mum. I asked her to come into my bedroom and sit on the bed. There, while standing, I started to get undressed. This is what I said. "Mum. On the train today, (top off) I let a man put his cock between my thighs. (Bra) I let him push backwards and forwards (Skirt) until he came up against my cunt,(very deliberate use of a "sin" word for shock value) but on top of my knickers. (knickers off and flicked almost casually at her on the bed)

You can see how wet I got and you can see his cum all over them. There is even some on the back of my skirt. (Standing there naked in front of her.) Now, I am going to do two things and also tell you something. First, I am going to shave my pubic hair off. I have never liked how sticky it gets when I am horny, and yes, mum, I DO get horny. Second, I am going to come back in here and masturbate. I want you now to understand that from now on I will do whatever I want with my own body. If I want to have a wank, I will. If I want to get fucked, I will. If I want to have sex with another girl, I will. Mum, I love you and Dad very much, but your ways are not mine."

I was THAT cold and clinical. And you know what? It was wonderful! Mum said, "Well, I don't approve, but I know I can't stop you." But she didn't say it like she hated me. In fact she hugged me and said "Try not to make too much noise."

I tell you what, masturbating on my own bed in my own house.....WHAT a thrill.

So, I guess I have the keys to the car now. I wonder where I will go??